george carlin quotes government

George Carlin was one of the most iconic comedians of all time and he had a lot to say about government. 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George Carlin, The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. The people are fucked.George Carlin, A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed.George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.George Carlin, I think I am, therefore, I am I think.George Carlin, Everyone smiles in the same language.George Carlin, People who say they dont care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they dont care what people think.George Carlin, Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat. } Thats the problem., I call him Governor Bush because thats the only political office hes ever held legally in this country., Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance., Forget the politicians. //]]> Now you can finally see what made George Carlin the dad tick. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. George Carlin, 14. You know how I define the economic and social classes in this country? And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. George Carlin, 62. October 29, 2004. " If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else. I enjoy describing how things are, I have no interest in how they ought to be. And I certainly have no interest in fixing them. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. } Question it, and try to see the world for what it actually is, as opposed to what someone or some company or some organization or some government is trying to represent it as, or present it as, however they've mislabeled it or dressed it up or told you. George Carlin, The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. They all said: Try to live together peacefully. BAM! var cookiePair = cookie.split('='); The following quotes are some of the most thought provoking sentences youll ever read. BAM! Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days Ive stayed alive. Its what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. The owners of this country know the truth: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. George Carlin, 83.Theres a reason education sucks, and its the same reason it will never ever ever be fixed. Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. Then you live in an old age home. That's the problem." "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out." " Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity ." Its because volunteers work for no pay. Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school. George Carlin. George Carlin - Quotes, Death & 7 Words - Biography var useSSL = "https:" == document.location.protocol; Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. Died: June 22, 2008 (aged 71) George Carlin Quotes . Laugh often, long and loud. Did you ever stop to thnk about all the people we kill? In this blog post, weve compiled some of his most compelling quotes on the subject for you to consider as well! You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain, All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another, "It's harder to be funny from the position of power. Beneath George Carlins biting sarcasm and razor-sharp wit lay a heartfelt indignation at the injustices he observed in the world around him. Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. var stylesheet = document.createElement("link"); Life is a zero sum game. George Carlin, 36. People forget there is such a thing as memory, and that when a wound heals it leaves a permanent scar that never goes away, but merely fades a little. Keep in mind, the news media are not independent; they are a sort of bulletin board and public relations firm for the ruling class-the people who run things. Some people dream of things that never were, and ask, why not? If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. Im always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize Im listening to it. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.. I love individuals. Im completely in favour of the separation of Church and State. Some people see things that are and ask, Why? And armbands. Actually, I think that class was called Religion. So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. But did you ever notice that we have no war on homelessness? Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles.George Carlin, When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?George Carlin, The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.George Carlin, Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.George Carlin, I have as much authority as the Pope. A = p.createElement(s); The owners of this country know the truth: It's called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. Disgusting that people still make that argument that we can never cut defense but we can cut education. George Carlin 13. Do not believe anything the government tells you - George Carlin Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. After all, he was one of the most successful comedians of all time! Your email address will not be published. I have certain rules I live by. Quotes, 60 Confidence Quotes to Help You Understand Your Self-Worth, Chris Evans Inspiring Quotes on Happiness, Success, and Being Laser Focused on Love, Strangers Spring Into Action to Save a Driver in Crisis on a Busy Road [VIDEO], 8-Year-Old Finds Out His Favorite Waffle House Waiter Is Hiding a Secret Doesnt Hesitate to Raise $64,000 for Him, White Woman Refuses to Listen to Dad After He Forbid Her From Marrying a Black Man 60 Years Later, Theyre Still Together, Kansas City Chiefs Fans Donate Over $300,000 to Buffalo Childrens Hospital After Dramatic Playoff Win Versus Rivals. I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. After all, he was one of the most successful comedians of all time! Laugh until you gasp for breath. George Carlin, 3. }, He had a way of critiquing and making fun of the government without necessarily getting into trouble. A comedian can say things that you may not want to hear but need to. My mind doesnt work that way, I got this real moron thing I do, its called thinking and Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions I have certain rules I live by. George Carlin died on June 22, 2008, from cardiac failure at the age of 71. Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. return cookiePair[1]; I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.George Carlin,Brain Droppings, THINGS YOU NEVER HEAR: Please stop sucking my dick or Ill call the police. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.George Carlin, Some people see things that are and ask, Why?Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not?Some people have to go to work and dont have time for all that.George Carlin, Meow means woof in cat.George Carlin. Nothing changed.George Carlin, Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?George Carlin, I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. Deal with it.George Carlin, Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.George Carlin, He and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly.George Carlin, I dont know how you feel, but Im pretty sick of church people. When youre born you get a ticket to the freak show. I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. Authors. 5. Creative Commons. To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. George Carlin, 61. Before, all you had to go by were these 14 quotes. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) #government. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("signedin", "false"); if (window.csa) { My advice: just keep moving straight ahead. If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. "Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music." - George Carlin 4. Tell people theres an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. Aparently we're not ready for that! Don't forget: YOU have the power to make ANYTHING happen. Being considered as one of the top comedians of all time,George is well known for his black humor, political views, observations on language, psychology, and religion along with many other taboo subjects. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky. If black boxes survive air crashes why dont they make the whole plane out of that stuff? George Carlin, 55. The larger the group, the more toxic, the more of your beauty as an individual you have to surrender for the sake of group thought. 125 Best George Carlin QuotesFunny George Carlin Quotes on Life You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. George Carlin, 70. Have you ever noticed that the only metaphor we have in our public discourse for solving problems is to declare war on it? He loves you and he needs money. , We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. You dont. Apparently, were not ready for that! George Carlin, 72. The Catholic Church alone could wipe out the national debt if all you did was tax their real estate.George Carlin, In America, anyone can become president. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. George Carlin, 13. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. Dont look for it. People are wonderful one at a time. //TOP 25 QUOTES BY GEORGE CARLIN (of 976) | A-Z Quotes A.src = t; Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. "Never argue with an idiot. If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin, 32. And, let me tell you, theres nothin like it. If you burn the flag, youre burning the flag for what you perceive to be the bad things the country has done. Whether youre looking for inspirational or funny quotes by George Carlin or whether youre looking for his famous quotes politics and education, its all here.

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